We Weren't Crazy
by just-beginning
Summary: Steve needs a change of scenery and starts spending some time in New York City. He's not the only one trying to start over there, and it's not so bad having someone to make new memories with in the city-not bad at all. Of course, there's also Stark's wit to endure, along with mutants, S.H.I.E.L.D, nightmares, death, neighbors, and bikinis - nothing's easy.
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome!**

 **I've been batting around this story for a while. I think I probably started it about a year ago and have been working on it on-and-off ever since. I'm not sure why I haven't started posting long before this, but I'm several chapters out ahead of myself now so I should be able to keep up on posting.**

 **Not many Original Characters in this story, though I do pull characters from X-Men ...but that's Marvel Universe, so it's allowed, right? Right?! I wouldn't say you need to know a ton about the x-men to follow the story- I think I explain any important history characters mention.**

 **So on with the show! Enjoy, and let me know what you think :)**

* * *

 **Introduction  
**

Everything was sleek lines, expansive, and most certainly _expensive_. It was aesthetically pleasing in some ways, sure, but it couldn't possibly all be necessary. This behemoth skyscraper was about flash, proving what the owner had.

"Stark," Steve sighed.

After paying the cab driver, he'd fetched his duffle bag from the trunk and then lingered upon stepping out onto the sidewalk in the sun. He craned his head back to fully take-in Stark Tower and it's repaired glory. The place had needed some fixes after Loki's staged invasion those months ago. Of course, Tony Stark was also making efforts towards the cleaning up of the rest of the city, which Steve could only respect. Iron Man was nothing if not for ( _most of_ ) the people.

Iron Man was well and good; it was Tony Stark that Steve tended to have the trouble with on a day-to-day basis.

Though not so seriously as to skip visiting. Stark had seemed sincere in his invite that any of The Avengers were welcome at his tower- _'humble abode,_ ' as he liked to try to call it. Steve had never been certain he would take the Billionaire up on that, but he'd been feeling an itch to get out of D.C.

Captain America, despite fame and positive acclaim, didn't have a lot of good pals to call up.

So, he'd found himself back in NYC.

Inside of the white-tiled lobby, there was a long glass desk, behind which sat a tall blonde woman and two dark men in suits. An inexplicable, yet not exactly unappealing, contemporary art piece stood as a tall statue behind the desk in the middle of the atrium, bordered by straight-angled chairs facing the elevator bank.

Unsure where exactly he was supposed to go in the massive building, he approached the streamline desk. The woman, with her high ponytail, watched him and waited expectantly as he approached, free hand pressed into the pocket of his brown leather jacket.

"Hi, I'm-"

"I know," the blonde beamed at him. "Mr. Stark is expecting you, so he's waiting upstairs- he's in his lab," she pointed a red-painted fingernail towards the elevators. "It's on level 56 just over there."

"Thank you, ma'am," he nodded and did as he was directed.

An elevator pinged open to accept him and slid swiftly upwards.

...

Upstairs, Captain Rogers' host was in his lab muttering under his breath.

"I can year you, so you might as well speak up," the woman in the room rolled her eyes.

"Well, ya know ...you're letting me down," he told her frankly, tossing his hands about. "You're supposed to be a whiz-kid, but -"

"I'm not a _kid_ ," the brunette protested.

"Well, whiz-woman just sounds stupid," he waved away her reasoning with childish logic of his own.

" _You_ sound stupid"

Okay, so maybe the entire thing had devolved into rather childish bickering.

"Listen to us," Tony grumbled and raised his eyes towards the heavens -he'd clearly come to the same conclusion as her.

"Look," the young woman sighed, looking up from schematics before her in an attempt to start over. "I don't know what you're all pissy about. I helped you with cracking into S.H.I.E.L.D's network on their helicarrier-"

"For the record," Tony overrode her, holding up a finger for absolute silence so he would have a chance to clarify. "I did not _need_ your help- JARVIS and I are a perfectly fine team. _That_ was like testing your resume to decide if I was going to let you stay here or not..."

"You had already talked to Hank and agreed," the girl reminded him simply.

"I could have gone back on my word- Senators don't scare me," he informed her, carelessly tossing a small screw at her.

The screw was followed by a paperclip he had plucked off of her work table.

"Now you're just being annoying. _What I'm saying_ is: are you sure we want to push our luck? If S.H.I.E.L.D is leaving you alone, can't you just let it be?" she reminded him of the fact that S.H.I.E.L.D was not prowling around trying to get him to do this or that with them at the moment.

"I don't let things go," he chirped. "That's not who I am ...I like to know things. I'll pick and poke until I find out -I thought you were supposed to be the same way? I mean, you were all for hacking that helicarrier," he used her example against her.

The brunette rolled her eyes and shifted in her seat. He wasn't completely unaware of her nature, curious even if just for the sake of being curious.

"I'd prefer to lay low," she told him. "It's sort of why I came here."

"You came to New York City to work in the city's newest, high-profile building to _lay low_? No," Tony smirked. "Maybe for a change of scenery, but not to lay low. Have some fun!"

"I -fun," she scoffed. "I'm perfectly capable of having fun."

"Do you go out?" Tony wondered aloud, clasping his hands behind his back so he could rock on the balls of his feet.

"Sometimes"

"Where?"

"...wherever I want, _dad_."

"Ah, so you go after my age," he nodded sagely, knowing this meant the argument was over because she was out of prime logic. "...this is gonna happen," he shrugged, nodding more to himself than to his befuddled friend. "We're going to have this fun."

He nodded again, perfectly confident, and waltzed away, across the lab and down the side hall that lead to the break room and bathrooms.

"Fun is a subjective term," she called after him not so loudly.

She was not fully convicted either way on the topic at the moment. She wasn't looking for trouble, but Tony also wanted to know some _very_ interesting things. Either way, she had learned from observing Ms. Potts that it was sometimes beneficial to play devil's advocate with Tony Stark, if only to get him debating with himself and actually think about his ideas.

...

Fifty-six floors seemed to fly by awfully fast, for Steve was soon stepping out into Stark's personal lab. High tables dotted the floor with chairs and stools here and there; they were filled with tools and equipment that he could not begin to guess at the purpose of. Computer screens hung from the ceiling at about chest-level, some blank and others with numbers and diagrams he didn't bother looking too closely at.

His eyes instead scanned the space for Stark himself, yet the only person he saw was a brunette woman perched on a stool, eyes focused forward at one of the wide data screens.

"Um-"

"Cap!"

Tony had rounded a corner from around the elevators, looking cheerfully aloof as ever. A smile creased his face, and he clapped Steve on the shoulder in a good-natured and welcoming way.

"Trip alright?"

"Sure; didn't kill me"

"Once the air pad is finished, next time you can fly right to me- no need for commercial flights and cabs," he waved away the need for such frivolous time-suckers.

"It was fine," Steve chuckled.

"Yeah, yeah, and I'm sure you flew Coach -don't tell me," the man held his hand up to stop any story the other man might want to tell. "Kat! Get up and come say hello!"

Steve's attention was forced back to the woman on the stool, who looked up now that she was addressed.

"Never heard of manners, Stark?" Steve raised an eyebrow.

"Not likely," the woman snorted.

"Stop," Tony pointed a finger at her as he lead his fellow Avenger into the lab. "You already know my friend here," he gestured to Steve. "Captain, this is Katherine Pryde."

"Nice to meet you," she did slide of her stool, then, and covered the remaining distance to offer her hand. "Call me Katie."

"Steve," he had the manners to introduce himself properly, and more humbly, than the billionaire. "Pleasure's mine, Katie."

He enveloped her hand with his own larger one, shaking firmly before placing his hands back into his pockets. He was pretty sure there was little in this room he ought to actually touch.

"She's my newest acquisition," Tony smiled proudly, which seemed awfully odd ...not to mention rude. "A toy I haven't tired of ... _yet_. I'm sure your time will come."

"...where's Pepper. She can control you," Katie muttered. "I just moved here a couple months ago to work for Stark Industries for a while..."

"Forever," Tony butted in, voice chipper.

"We have a mutual friend"

"My condolences," Steve nodded.

She grinned and pulled her long cardigan a little further around her shoulders. As she wasn't the one Rogers had come to visit, she retreated from the pair and sat back on the stool she had vacated. Her hands tapped away on the screen before her, something Steve still found strange to see sometimes. He certainly didn't consider himself caught up on technology.

"She's here from Westchester ...Xavier Institute," Tony turned his full attention back to Steve with a keen look

"Okay," Steve supposed maybe this was a college.

"...wanna know what that is?"

"...no," he decided.

"You don't want to know anything about her?" Tony glowered.

"I don't think it's polite to talk about someone who's only feet away," Steve leveled at the other man, incredulity in his voice.

"Thank you," Katie called over, flashing a thumbs up in their direction.

"Kill joy. I'll show you your room then- top few floors just above us are a gym and living quarters. You'll love it," he changed topics and lead the Captain back to the elevator so they could continue to ascend higher.

Once the men were gone, Katherine Pryde smiled to herself.

Tony was exhausting at times, but she found she often enjoyed his energy. He sometimes said stupid things and could be mildly insensitive, but she had never gotten the feeling that he was actually trying to be brutal or hurtful. He seemed like a good guy, and Hank has vouched for him, so she was happy to be there.

She twitched in surprise as her pocket vibrated, and she dug out her phone to check the call. It was from the school, where she'd long lived and taught, so she hesitated and stared long at the lit screen. It was a short war within her. Part of her wanted to pick up and see who was calling...it _was_ her home, after all. She'd done most of her real growing up there, found acceptance there, and learned to respect herself ...

Home.

On the other hand, part of her had come to fear the kinds of calls that could come from the school and the kind of news she might receive.

The part of her that was nervous about answering and hearing whoever was on the other end won out. If it was important, they would leave a voicemail- she promised herself that she'd listen if a message was left. That was the best she could do today

* * *

"Thanks for having me," Steve thanked the other man once they were in the elevator and no longer distracted.

"Course," Tony shrugged. "Told you I had plenty of room. Renovations are done and hardly broken in."

"I'm sure they're exquisite," Steve grinned truthfully.

He imagined the living quarters Tony spoke of would be complete apartments, fully stocked and lavishly furnished. More than he'll ever actually need, in other words. He had his own apartment in D.C., but it was quite simple. It had what he needed and nothing more; he couldn't imagine that anything in _Tony's_ life was that way. Practical, he was sure, had not been on the playboy's mind when he built the place.

"Pepper toned down some of my decorating wishes, but you'll want for nothing," Tony nodded proudly and spread his arm grandly when the elevator doors hissed open again. "Welcome home."

Steve ignored the clear implication that Tony believed that he'd never want to leave this apartment once he stepped foot inside.

He was greeted by a spacious living room filled with stylish, deep blue furniture before floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking Manhattan. A fireplace separated the sitting room from a full dinning area and small, granite-countered kitchen. Past the dining area, Steve could see there was a balcony, but Tony lead him down a dim hallway. Lights came on the further they walked, guiding them to the sprawling bedroom and connected master bath.

"Wanna get comfy now, Cap?" Tony allowed him to move forward into the room ahead of him. "Or wanna head out on the town ...dinner's on me."

"Let's do dinner," Steve agreed and dropped his bag inside the door.

He could see the bed and small couch here were plush as expected. It was beautiful and, of course, much appreciated, but ...it also made Steve feel somewhat uncomfortable.

"JARVIS, notify the necessary staff that I'm leaving," Tony spoke aloud as he lead Steve once more to the elevator bay.

' _Certainly, sir'_

Steve stopped and looked around, for he had not been aware of anyone else on the floor.

"Computer system," Tony informed him, seeing the problem immediately. "He's installed throughout the building, used on the private levels of the Tower. It's programmed to know you, take orders, answer questions ...he'll help you out in a pinch. JARVIS, say hello to Captain America."

' _A pleasure, Mr. Rogers'_

 _"_ Hi," Steve answered to no one, thoroughly wrong-footed.

Tony didn't seem at all bothered.

"So, when was the last time you were in New York? You know, besides the time we were saving the world," Tony asked in the elevator.

"This is where I woke up," Steve told him, leaning against the metal wall. "S.H.I.E.L.D thought it might help ...ya know, being back where I came form, but so much has changed. Didn't really help at all..."

Tony sighed uncomfortably. That wasn't really the turn he'd hoped the conversation would take; he'd hoped they'd have a perfectly fine night out- he planned to get Steve something that would make him rue the days of bland military rations he'd once had to live with.

"Well," he straightened himself proudly. "I'll show you today's New York. It's not so bad."

"Sounds good," Steve smiled with forced fondness. "We can have dinner later if I came in the middle of something, though."

He remembered suddenly that Tony had been in his lab, perhaps working on something important. Steve was not much of a fan of the billionaire's conceit, but he couldn't deny that the other man could clearly do amazing work.

"I own this place; anything can wait for me."

Though immodestly stated, Steve didn't doubt this.

"No one can stop me, and Kat can handle what we were looking at ...smart girl," Tony conceded. "Computer wiz ...kind of quiet lately, though..."

"You really want me to ask about her, don't you?" Steve raised a perplexed eyebrow.

"Yes, I do"

"...does Ms. Potts know how interested you are in her?"

"My interest is more intellectual than personal ...mind in the gutter much, Stars and Stripes? You need a girlfriend? You can buy those in New York..."

"Absolutely not," Steve scowled.

Tony chortled gleefully.

"Alright ...because, if we're honest, you wouldn't have to pay for it. Captain America and all ..."

"Is that what you do with your name?" Steve crossed his arms over his chest in disapproval.

The solider was back to stoic, unamused face. Tony just didn't have an easy time winning with this guy.

" _I'm_ locked down," he shrugged inconsequentially. "If I was single ...I'd mingle. In the absence of that, I'll live vicariously through you."

Eyes rolling up to the ceiling, Steve shook his head minutely.

"Maybe I was better off in D.C..."

"No, no, you'll enjoy your visit ...time away from Patches will loosen you up. I think I'll need to prescribe you regular visits so you don't go permanently frigid out there..." he considered.

"You as a doctor is a scary thought..."


	2. Talk About It

Talk about It  
 _"Beating yourself up is never a fair fight."  
_ _-_ ** _Andrea Gibson_**

Steve was not altogether comfortable in the familiar office.

It wasn't the room. The physical structure was cozy enough, he supposed. The furniture was nicely worn-in, as if someone had lived with it and enjoyed it ...maybe taken naps there. All of the wood-the end table, bookshelves, and desk -were tones of mahogany that felt warm and welcoming. Even the couple pictures on the walls were perfectly harmless where they hung, one next to multiple degrees ...most notably, a doctorate degree in Counseling Psychology.

The room was not like the rest of the Triskelion, with it's straight lines and sleek, modern decor. _That_ bit Steve appreciated because it was nice, which was surely the very purpose of the room's scheme. However, it was more of what the room meant, what it _really_ was, that unbalanced him.

He came there once a week to meet with Dr. Helena Pullman -PhD, not M.D. She had studied _psychology_ , which put him off. He wasn't crazy or hysterical.

Then again ...life _is_ a little crazy.

So he understood why S.H.I.E.L.D wanted him to talk to her, but he didn't have to _like_ it just because it was reasonable. Often, he was tight-lipped. He sometimes felt bad, for Dr. Pullman was kind and he would have very much liked to give her what she wanted ...but it was too personal. It was too much.

"Captain Rogers, I hear you took a trip to New York," she began after he entered and just sat for several minutes because he had nothing to talk about.

He sighed.

The Hub there in D.C was a large place spanning multiple, vast floors of varying degrees of secrecy. Yet, somehow, his life could not remain personal- he was gossip fodder.

"Yes," he answered anyway because it was factual. "I stayed a few days at Stark Tower."

"With Tony Stark?"

"Mmhmm ...I have an open invitation," he reported.

"You don't sound too thrilled with your visit," Dr. Pullman tilted her head curiously.

Steve just stared back at her a moment, blinking. He took her in, from her crisp blazer to her thin, angled face surrounded by short gray curls. She was kind and relaxing ...if only he wanted to talk to her.

He did _try_ \- she usually told him that was enough.

"It was nice to get away," he shrugged, non-committed, as he rubbed his hands together. "Tony's just ...a contradiction," he tried to be fair.

"I don't suppose he shares many of your sensibilities," Dr. Pullman suppressed a smile, as the exploits of the eccentric billionaire had always been well-publicized.

"Not generally, no," Steve scoffed.

"So if you don't always like _his_ company, how did you spend your time while away?"

"Apart from him ...I saw the city-I did a lot of walking," he shared.

"...that sounds lonely," the older woman observed softly.

Steve blinked. Regardless of her gentle tone, her words somehow felt like a sharp barb. Unsettled, he crossed his arms tightly over his chest as a barrier for himself.

"Not any lonelier than anywhere else"

His words popped out spitefully, as if seeking prove her wrong. It was only after he had spoken them that he realized what an admission it was, what a vulnerable thing he'd just spat out.

He blinked again.

"Well ...what was that like to say?" the doctor clearly read the surprise on his face.

"I would rather I hadn't," he confessed.

"But you have - it's out there in the world now. Maybe we can do something with that..." she encouraged him.

He thought maybe he pouted then. His eyes focused on the floor, boring holes into the tan carpet with his crystal eyes.

Not for the first time, he reminded himself that numerous S.H.I.E.L.D agents had sat on that couch with the same doctor doing the same kind of thing. It was okay to talk there. Dr. Pullman was safe ...she kept his confidences.

Though she did give summaries to S.H.I.E.L.D...

 _It was okay to talk here._

"Like what?" he ground out.

"Well, you've said you often feel lonely; that's a pretty heavy thing to carry around."

"Is it so surprising?" Steve challenged defensively. "How could I not be?"

"No; it's not surprising," she agreed. "You've lost a lot, and now you are forever out of the time that you've known. Over 70 years passed in the blink of an eye for you; that's a lot to grieve."

Steve shifted his weight left and right, arms still tucked tightly into each other across his chest. Loneliness, grieving ...he had not planned on having this sort of session with her today. He'd walked into this ...

"I suppose," he did not deny, eyes still on the carpet.

"Have you been letting yourself process all of that?"

"Sometimes," Steve frowned at the offending carpet.

Maybe ... _maybe_ he processed bits and pieces here and there. He would let himself think deeply a while on someone from his past or something that had happened in his old life ...but how could he process _everything_ that had happened? He'd woken there in 2012 without ever even having had the chance to slow down and digest what had gone on in _World War II._..

And he had to keep moving ...keep working. He couldn't just **stop**.

Maybe Dr. Pullman was out of her depth. How could she ever have experience helping someone deal with this much...

' _Selfish,'_ some voice in the back of his mind whispered to him.

He was not the only soldier who had seen a harsh war. He was not the only person to experience loss. He, alone, did not have a monopoly on pain...or regret ...or heartbreak. Why should he assume that he deserved a pity party?

"Ugh," he groaned and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees and dig his palms into his eyes.

He didn't know what to think.

"It's overwhelming," Dr. Pullman spoke softly after giving him time to quietly sit in his thoughts.

"To put it mildly," Steve heaved himself up to lean back on the couch and not be so closed-in on himself. "So what's the plan?"

He did well with plans, with orders.

Dr. Pullman had said when this began that she was not there to tell him what to do or how to live. She said she wouldn't talk him out of his feelings or dictate the course of a session ...but he _needed_ some direction now.

"Well ...maybe we could focus on this loss and lingering sense of isolation. We can talk about ways to work on processing grief when it wells up and how to work on making the life you want here in _this_ time," she suggested with a kindly smile. "You can't have had plans for this turn in your life ...maybe you can start to think about what it would be like to make some."

Okay, so she wasn't going to just give him the mission or make a plan for him. She'd help him making his own...

Maybe that was just as well, so, slowly, he nodded.

He could work with that.

* * *

Meanwhile, in Manhattan, Katie was asleep on the job.

Literally.

She'd been working diligently in her office room all morning like the dedicated Stark employee she had grown to be. While letting a program load, she had leaned back in her chair and kicked her feet up to enjoy her music a while. It had been an innocent enough move on her part, all intentions were good...and then she'd drifted to sleep amidst the slight clutter of her room.

She was not quite on Tony Stark's level of organized-chaos, but her desk had many notes laid about. Post-It notes were stuck along the edge of her various computer monitors, and she had a couple whiteboards of scribbles and a cork-board with tacked-up pictures and ideas. To her credit, she went through her things on a fairly regular basis to rid her space of moot papers...she tried to be more organized, but this was what she had for now.

Surrounded by yellow, white, and blue notes while splayed back in her chair ...that was how Tony Stark and Ms. Virginia 'Pepper' Potts found her.

"This is what I pay her for," Tony sighed with exaggerated melodrama.

"You work her too hard..."

"It's _my_ fault?"

"She logs a lot of hours ...we'll stop back after lunch," she suggested.

Tony rolled his eyes high, as her solution to the moment had no potential of fun ...not even a suggestion of it. So, ignoring her completely, he strolled into the office.

It was spacious with a large glass desk holding multiple computer monitors -there was even a monitor inlaid in the surface of the desk. It was situated against the right wall so that her whiteboards and cork-board were in sight when she sat at it in her leather desk chair. There was a tall, half-full bookshelf with a couple pictures atop it on the far wall, and there was even a slim, black couch along the right wall. His young computer whiz could have just laid there ...maybe he would have even left her alone _there._

But she was splayed out, head fallen back, and a deep crease in her brow while her eyes darted back and forth under thin lids.

"Doesn't even use the couch we furnished," Tony muttered at Pepper, waving an arm widely.

"Tony," she hissed.

He shrugged her off. It was a nice office- a workspace _he_ had provided upon her arrival. He could do as he pleased within it.

"Not even happy when you sleep?" he scoffed loudly, standing over her.

Katie released a sharp yelp, flailed haphazardly, and fell through her chair before she processed that it was Tony she saw above her. He gave up a sharp bark of laugher at her expense even as she scrambled desperately to her feet and looked around.

"Shouldn't sleep on my clock," Tony teased.

"Uh-huh," Katie agreed, but she was still looking around and patted herself to ensure her safety.

"...you alright, kid?" Tony did frown slightly, then, when he started to think this was an extended period of panic.

"Yup ...yeah, hey. Hi, Pepper," she waved past Tony.

"I tried to stop him"

"No hard feelings," Katie grinned, pleased that her voice was steady.

"...you're a very strange computer nerd sometimes," Tony shook his head.

"To what do I owe the visit," she rolled her eyes.

"Oh, um, I just _run_ the place," reminded Tony, puffing out his blue-tinted chest to clearly tell her he needed no reasons.

"Actually, that would be me," Pepper cut in because, in all fairness, she handled most of the logistics.

Tony exhaled as if irritated and then elected not to have that debate.

"Well, I own it ..." he declared, undisputed. "JARVIS reported to me that you were asleep..."

"You have him spy on me?!"

Tony grinned because he liked when other people got it and let JARVIS be a "him" instead of an "It."

"We were stopping by on our way to lunch," Pepper tiredly offered the real story. "We heard from Hanky today," she added.

"And how's my favorite Senator?" Katie smiled.

"Busy, but he's going to be in the city next week and wanted to go get dinner. He asked that we be sure to extend the invitation," Pepper informed her kindly, leaning her shoulder in the doorway.

"The invitation is contingent on you doing work and not sleeping," Tony decided, otherwise checked-out of the conversation as he strolled over to peruse the notes Katie had on her boards.

" _Not_ true," Pepper was shaking her head. "Do you think you'll come?"

Katie considered as she dropped to sit in her desk chair. Flexing her foot back and forth, she swayed her chair and watched Tony unabashedly look through her things.

"Sure," she decided.

She had been keeping the school and many she knows there at an arms length lately- it was easier that way- but Hank McCoy had been good to her. When he had gotten wind she was finding somewhere to stay away from the school a while, he'd told her she would be a good fit with Stark Industries, given her proclivities with electronics. He had gotten to know Tony, and then Pepper, during Tony's many hearings after he declared to the world he was Iron Man. Senator McCoy had been an adamant supporter of Tony and, having taken a liking to the well-spoken doctor, Tony now donated generously to McCoy's campaign to oppose the Mutant Registration Act.

"Okay, then I'll tell him you'll come and we'll set a date," Pepper smiled.

"Sure, let me know when and where," Katie nodded agreeably and sank back into her desk chair.

It was soft but wide and steady, allowing her a secure place to calm down. Never mind her less-than-graceful exit from it moments before.

"Gotta lighten up, Kitty-Kat"

"Ugh, I don't go by 'Kitty' anymore- I haven't in years," she brunette spouted.

"Then you can't let McCoy use old nicknames in front of me," Tony blamed her, flicking a stray staple at her.

"I try," Katie promised.

It wasn't her fault she was still "Kitty Pryde" to the senator. He was kindly and she liked him very much- they've had several talks about science, evolution, technology ... but he was also someone who didn't seem to let her grow up all she has wanted. He still saw her as his student, which was heartwarming and tiring in equal measure.

"Try harder," Tony shrugged simply and pivoted on his heel to join Pepper. "We're off to lunch if you want to continue your nap."

"Maybe I will," Katie sniffed just for the sake of being obstinate.

"Would you like to come to lunch?" Pepper extended, ignoring the bickering.

Katherine Marie Pryde was a Stark employee, true, but she was also more than the average hired help. She was part of an organization not wholly unlike the Avengers and, more importantly, she was a friend of their friend. They could be genuine with her rather than strictly professional.

"Uh, I thought this was a you-and-me-only date," Tony interrupted.

"Lunch doesn't count as a date," Pepper sweetly informed him.

"True," Katie sided.

Tony snapped his eyes to her, then back to Pepper.

"My life is over," he grumbled.

"And you love every minute of it," Pepper hummed, reaching a kiss to his chin.

Tony grunted but did not protest to this.

"Coming, Pryde?" he checked, eyes not upon her as he gave in to his lady's decided invitation.

"No, I should probably finish this while it's going," she pointed to her computer.

"Bye, then," Tony nodded, steering his CEO away before the younger woman changed her mind.

"Bye," she laughed.

Alone, she twisted back towards her computer with a long sigh. She was glad Tony woke her from her dark, morbid dreams, but not so much so that she'd panicked in front of her employers ...okay, _friends._

Maybe she should have gone to lunch in order to flourish the friendship side of their relationship.

She shook her head of frivolous musings and honed back in on her computer to try to speed things up. The faster she got done, the faster she could just _go_ ...why not take an early afternoon? She thought she would go running ...clear her head.

Plan in mind, she diligently finished the work she started once she stepped out to grab a light lunch in the buildings cafeteria.

She was satisfied with her work day by the time she left, even though it was brief. Katie left herself in a good spot to pick up the next day- she'd be set.

Momentarily, she considered going upstairs to use the gym Tony had shown her there. He had told her he understood if she wanted to keep up training even though she was no longer at Xavier's School, so she had access ... _but_ , it was nice out -she would go to Roosevelt Park instead. The sun might feel refreshing.

After a short walk to her apartment to change, Katie was soon jogging the paths of the park. It was sunny and warm- a perfect day to be out.

As she set a pace she could easily maintain, everything else slipped away. There was herself, her music ...nothing else was her problem. Nothing.

There weren't people to worry about, only her two feet continuing to beat on pavement. No responsibilities, no work.

She sank into the music pounding in her ears and just continued to run.

* * *

Steve was relying on similar physical exertion through the evening. He did not need anything of the latest exercise equipment S.H.I.E.L.D naturally had about- the Triskelion had three basement floors devoted to training. Past one of the weight rooms was a mat room lined with padding. Sparring mats covered most of the floor, and a variety of punching bags hung on the far left.

Here, Steve released any and all tensions. Someone else had been in there when he had entered, but they'd long since finished. Steve simply carried on.

His fists beat on the bag, punishing it for unknown crimes. Occasionally, he added a kick, which swung the bag more violently still. He didn't need to plan, didn't need to think.

He was disconcerted by his afternoon with Dr. Pullman. No matter how reasonable she was, no matter how kind - how in any other scenario he may have been pulled to doting on her - Steve could not settle himself to admitting how much his life hurt. How very heavy his enhanced shoulders felt under the weight that was his life...

So he came to the gym, where he knew what to do ...where so very little could hurt him.

He did not know how to talk to Dr. Pullman about his life or his war of emotions.

In here, he didn't have to think about it. In here, things were more simple.

 _Thud._

Chaturi.

 _Thud._

Red Skull.

 _Thud. Thud._

Loki with the tesseract.

 _Thud._

Bucky strapped to a table.

 _Thud, thud, thud._

Aliens overrunning Manhattan _._

 _Thud_.

His soon-to-be Commandos as POWs.

 _Thud, thud._

Tony unconscious in his Iron suit.

 _Thud, thud, thud._

Peggy Carter.

Her face swam unbidden in his mind's eye, and he spun a kick straight to the bag- it went flying into the wall, snapped from it's chain.

"Egh," he groaned and dug his hands into his hair in frustration.

He knew the broken bag was no big deal, but he glared at it hotly all the same.

He had these memories in an overlapping form; they all seemed recent to him. The last 70 years were nothing ...he may as well have liberated concentration camps this very Spring or seen Peggy smile at him only months ago.

His mind forgot sometimes.

Those camps stood as museums or ruin, now. Peggy was old and unwell. The rest of the world kept moving.

...without him.

Though the last months had proven the world could still use a Captain America; for this reason, he would stay. He would figure it out ...without or without Dr. Pullman.

He frowned at the thought of her and picked up a replacement bag with a grunt.

He was not yet ready to leave.


	3. Late Nights

Late Nights  
 _"The past does not haunt us. We haunt the past. We allow our minds to focus in that direction. We open memories and examine them. We re-experience emotions we felt during the painful events we experienced because we are recalling them in as much detail as we can."  
_ **-Augusten Burroughs (** ** _This is How_** **)**

Rue though he was to accept anything that Tony Stark once declared a "prescription," Steve didn't mind staying in New York.

It was still more extravagant than he needed, but it was nice. The bed, specifically, was way too much ...and yet he largely enjoyed the living quarters designated as his. He was naturally free to come and go, and New York also had the benefit of him not feeling like S.H.I.E.L.D was always watching. He was confident Stark Tower was protected enough that the organization wasn't watching or listening- _couldn_ 't be. Steve didn't have anything to hide in D.C., but knowing S.H.I.E.L.D poked around was aggravating.

After what he had learned on the helicarrier regarding S.H.I.E.L.D's duplicity and half-truths, he was rightfully dubious with the organization at times. He didn't like it- didn't like that Tony was right to complain and snoop- but now he knew the truth.

The truth ...if only it were pure and simple as it had once seemed. He wanted to believe in his government, in the power structure that tried to uphold justice and safety. Though he worked for S.H.I.E.L.D, he watched himself ...always.

The work was exhilarating and familiar. The doubts ...those hurt sometimes.

Steve didn't want to think poorly of the organization that Peggy dreamt up and helped found. She'd had a hand in building what S.H.I.E.L.D was; more than anything, he wanted the agency to be above reproach...

It was thoughts like this -among many others- that made him restless and unable to settle to peace or sleep. So, on his second visit to New York City, he ended up walking the streets in the middle of the night ...or early hours of the morning, if you'd rather.

The city still seemed as strange to him at night as during the day, though it being uncrowded was a nice bonus. There were various construction areas around, still rebuilding from Loki's last visit; he felt somewhat responsible but ultimately ignored them. Upon his last arrival to New York, he'd felt guilty about the remaining vestiges of destruction and thought he ought to help. Tony had been quick to inform him he donated enough money and that Steve would be happier avoiding the bureaucracy of the ordeal.

 _'Also, we saved the city from worse, so my guilt is super limited,'_ the billionaire had added with a cocky grin.

So, it was of little consequence to Steve as he wandered sparse sidewalks. He couldn't sleep some nights, and when he sat alone in the grandiosity of Stark Tower after a nightmare ...some times he couldn't figure out what his life was.

Once he thought he'd walked it of, spent some energy and let the cool night air cleanse his thoughts, he headed back to Stark Tower. Even if he hadn't already been acquainted to NYC, the monstrosity was hard to miss.

He got into the building with the _Avengers_ ID entrusted to him, and he nodded silently to the equally quiet security guard who manned the front desk at night. As he began to move fully inside, he heard the elevator _"ping_ " before he'd even reached the bay. This sufficiently caught his attention; his head whipped up in time to see a bag and foot step into one of the elevator cars.

Who else was returning at 4:00am?

* * *

Around 2:00 in the morning, Katie had twitched in her sleep. By 2:30am, she was wide awake and chest heaving.

She was still sitting up cross-legged in bed at 3:00am, so she threw the covers off of her in a huff. There would probably be no getting back to sleep tonight, so she didn't see the point in trying. Rather than lay in bed with visions of death in her mind's eye, she turned on her lights so that she could gather her things and take a shower. Her hands were shaking as she did so, but she ignored them ...it would stop in time.

It wasn't not her first nightmare; nor would it be her last. In her mind she could always see her old teammates, who she missed and also purposefully stayed away from.

She often dreamt of walking the familiar warm halls of Xavier's Institute for Higher Learning ...sometimes perfectly content. Other times while blood slowly coated the wooden halls, seeping from vents and picture frames. The sight was grotesque, the smell overwhelming...

She wanted to wretch just thinking of it.

Instead, she mechanically got herself ready for the day, never mind the early morning hour. Once her wavy hair was dried, she changed into leggings and a long, knit sweater so she could just go ahead and go into work. If she was going to be awake, she may as well be getting something done.

"Hi Chuck," she greeted when she arrived at work and wandered towards the front desk.

The guard who worked the front desk at night was a nice guy ...she assumed. He rarely had much to say besides direct, concise answers to questions, but he also didn't give her crap for showing up at odd hours some nights -okay: mornings.

"Morning Ms. Pryde," he nodded.

"Want a coffee from upstairs?" she offered because he was not meant to leave this floor at any time unless there was an alert- at least, that's what Tony said and Katie had never seen Chuck anywhere else in the building.

"No thank you"

"Have a good one, then"

Adjusting her bag on her shoulder, she continued to the elevators; without much of a wait, she headed up to the 56th floor.

* * *

"Hold the door," Steve called out to request and jogged forward.

A hand snapped out to keep the doors from sliding out, followed by a curious dark visage.

One he actually knew.

"Oh ...thought it was Chuck," the brunette nodded to him and stepped back. "The security guy," she answered his perplexed look.

"Chuck," he repeated -it would be polite to remember this.

"Charlie, really," she added. "I just call him Chuck ...dunno if he likes that."

The smile playing around her mouth told him there was something to that ...a joke or memory, perhaps. He wondered if it had anything to do with Stark's antics.

"Katherine, right?" he double-checked.

"Katie ...glad to know I can make an impression in a few minutes."

"I've always been good with names," he informed her. "Not that you didn't..." he hastily added. "Er..."

Yup, still not smooth with the ladies right off the bat...

"I get what you mean," Katie chortled at his clear frustration. "So, are you just getting in?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. From a walk," he explained himself.

"Oh, that's n- eh," she trailed away.

"What?" he rose a brow at her abrupt abandonment of what she had to say

"Well, my first reaction would be to tell somebody that's not safe at night..."

"Ah," he smirked.

"But, ya know, you're you, so ...it's probably fine," she grinned.

"Probably," he laughed and leaned back against the elevator wall, hands buried in his pockets.

Seconds later, it slowed to a stop.

When the doors opened, Steve recognized they were at Stark's lab; the overhead lights popped on as soon as Katie stepped out onto the tile floor. It was only when she did this that he realized he'd never punched the button for his floor, as he'd been more intent on seeing who was there. He reached out to rectify this, but curiosity stayed his hand and he followed the woman out.

"What goes on in here?" he asked her, looking all around- he injected authority into his tone in hopes of getting an answer.

When he had asked this of Stark, the man muttered about _"this and that._ " Steve wasn't clear if this was because he assumed (perhaps not incorrectly) that the Soldier wouldn't understand or because Stark genuinely didn't fully listen to him. He suspected a combination of the two was likely. In any case, maybe Katie would be somewhat more hospitable.

"Honesty, about half of it is knickknacks," the woman snorted, waving to a cluttered work table. "He does work on his big projects in here with JARVIS, but lately it's been personal projects while he thinks about a problem, I think," she grinned.

"Really?" Steve asked disbelievingly.

Katie saw him eyeing the clutter.

"He sort of seems to thrive on chaos," Katie laughed.

"Oh, trust me, I've noticed," he responded dryly. "So he works on electronics?"

Steve's hands were still in his jean pockets, so he'd not be tempted to touch when he peeked around the table. He saw plenty of wires here and there.

"His pet projects right now is making an AI robot for his and Pepper's apartment..." she informed.

"AI?" Steve questioned.

"Artificial Intelligence," Katie set her things down and softly explained; he straightened to attentively listen. "Basically, he's working on a little robot butler ...it could take orders, move around the apartment, problem solve ...like JARVIS," she realized. "JARVIS is AI, but this little guy would be walking around."

Steve mulled this over thoughtfully. He rarely made use of the JARVIS system Tony had told him of, as it still unnerved him slightly. He couldn't decide if a physical form would make it better or worse.

"That's ...something"

Katie grinned.

"Like I said, just a project to distract him. Some fun with animatronics ...and someone to make him a drink," she winked and turned back to her bag on the table she'd claimed.

"So," Steve wandered towards her table, "you must live on chaos a bit, too."

"It's not all mine," she quickly defended the muddled table. "Okay, a lot of the notes are ...and my office isn't pristine," she admitted.

" _This_ isn't your office?" Steve cocked his head.

"Nope. I'm officially down on the 26th floor in tech analysis," she shook her head, pulling a laptop from her bag as she did so. "But I have clearance up here ...sometimes to spitball with Tony about programming or help him out, other times because he's bored ...or if _I'm_ bored, to be fair. My office doesn't have this view."

She jerked her thumb to the floor-to-ceiling glass on her left where city lights sparkled below. Even at night, it looked lively from here.

"I see the draw," he agreed with a small smile.

They eyed the view together a few moments.

"I take it you're not up just to see the view," Katie ventured.

The way Steve's jaw clenched tightly indicated to her that she had gone too far.

 _'Shut your trap, Pryde,'_ she rolled her eyes at herself.

"I take it you aren't, either," he came back.

"Touche," she tilted her head.

She was at work and fully dressed, after all. There wasn't a lot of reason for that at 4:00am ...not that she doubted there were scientists elsewhere in the building forgoing sleep in favor of their latest idea.

"Couldn't do the sleeping thing any longer," she answered simply.

"Mmm, me either," Steve nodded, though he continued to eye her in a guarded fashion.

Katie nodded and wasn't sure where to take the conversation from there. She had treaded to uncomfortable territory without meaning to, forgetting they were not on familiar terms ...maybe because she was tired. Restless, her fingers found a discarded pen on the desk and fiddled with it, twisting it around her nimble fingers.

"...are you going back to bed anytime soon?" She attempted because she didn't enjoy the strained silence.

Steve shrugged, still standing near the window and not pulling his eyes from the streets below.

"...want to see a video I took of the flying droids Tony threw together as a project that definitely did _not_ work?" Katie offered.

She had witnessed first hand Steve's exasperation with Tony and the way her boss goaded the Super Soldier. It was amusing. Perhaps this would provide fodder.

Indeed, it pulled Steve's attention around back to her. He quirked an eyebrow to couple with his lopsided grin. In truth, he was not entirely sure just what a _droid_ was, but if there was a video he'd surely learn.

"Really?"

"Yeah," she hummed and waved him over.

She climbed onto her stool and removed another devise from her bag. Steve had seen one before; he was pretty sure they were called tablets. While she flipped it open, he picked up the nearest stool to him and carried it over to perch next to her at her table.

Steve tried to pay attention as she keyed in some kind of passcode and then tapped and swiped a few things until an image popped up on her touch screen. Holding it out, she clicked the middle of the image so that the recorded film could spring to life.

What followed was a video of a small, buzzing bit of machinery whirring back and forth around the lab as it ricocheted off of beams and lab equipment. Using Tony's head as size-reference when the machine came dangerously close, Steve guessed the device was only about the size of his hand. Still, it was out of control and moving fast enough that Tony was ducking and cursing. He was also fairly sure he heard muffled giggles near the camera; he supposed those would be from Katie filming. Indeed, the film cut out in a blur as the little plane flew straight at it.

"When was this?" Steve chuckled once this signaled the end of the video footage.

"Not as long ago as Tony would like to pretend," Katie smiled. "Again?"

"Once more won't hurt," Steve confirmed.

He watched again with a small grin, enjoying the thought of the know-it-all being human enough to fail at times.

"Did he fix it?"

"Oh, sure- it was a problem with the signal from the controller. We fixed it pretty easily," she shrugged and closed out of the video. "They were addicting for a while ...racing them, seeing what we could land them on without crashing. He got in some trouble with Pepper when he attached a camera and tried to fly over the shower curtain when she was in there."

"Always pushes a little far, doesn't he?" Steve rolled his eyes high.

"He toes a line," Katie agreed, though with marginally less disdain than Steve. "He doesn't mean any harm ...anyway, they're still around here somewhere. I'll dig them up if you want to see."

"That would be interesting," Steve wondered at the idea of using what she and Tony clearly regarded as toys.

Katie nodded and looked over to see that Steve's eyes were still on her tablet; he'd been watching how she handled it.

"Ever used one?" she offered it over to him.

"I've _seen_ them," he hesitated.

"Go on- just don't throw it and it'll be fine," she promised and extended her arm more forcefully.

Steve took it from her with both hands. Regardless of the way she had easily balanced it on one hand and tapped away with the other, he was unsure with it. It was lighter in his hands than he expected, and it was thin, so he set it flat on the table in front of him to look down at.

"It's so small ...how do things fit in it?" he questioned.

Katie laughed, but immediately regretted in when he seemed to deflate sheepishly.

"No, no," she waved her hands to try to brush away the laughter like it hadn't happened. "Don't feel bad ... _so_ many people don't really understand how they work- I promise. Seriously, a lot of people who've lived their whole lives with computers and internet could never explain how it works. I didn't meant to laugh at you."

"Okay," he nodded when she seemed adamant and sincere; he felt somewhat less foolish.

"The explanation would be pretty technical, and you can use it without knowing _why_ or _how_ it works," she told him patiently and, this time, soberly. "Tablets like this operate pretty much solely on touch ...you tap what you want to open or drag your finger to move something. Go ahead..."

He did as she instructed, and it was very strange to have so much be literally at the tip of his finger.

"So," she continued once she'd shown him how to open and close programs. "All of these shapes are applications ...basically tools. I can pick things I want and transfer them onto my tablet ...like, I've got a calendar on here, a scientific calculator, photo albums, something to tell me the weather, electronic books-"

"You can have whole books on here?" Steve raised an eyebrow, still grasping at the breadth and depth of the little thing before him.

"...bookshelves full," Katie smiled as his wonder and tapped open her Kindle so that she can swipe through some of her library.

"Gee..."

"I have a folder of games," she continued after closing it, "and a page of technical work apps, like CAD drawing...and, of course, the internet. Have you used the internet before?"

"Um, I've _seen_ it used, but I haven't done much myself, really," he admitted.

"That's okay, but we'll just start simple to get you used to this thing ...games," she happily suggested.

She showed him how to access her gams and set him up with a maze puzzle that grew progressively harder on each level to keep him engaged. She figured it would occupy as well as educate him- even Logan had gotten hooked on some of the strategy/logic puzzles she'd found.

That thought caused a twinge from missing him, but the frown was only momentary and she moved on. Since Captain America was busy with her tablet, she used her computer to check e-mails and start-in on some work.

 _Captain America_. She sent him a sidelong glance and grinned a little.

Despite what she had seen and who she had met in her life, she couldn't help but be **impressed**. She'd come across powerful people and seen some crazy things, but she had heard stories of Captain America growing up from her grandparents, and now he was sitting right there.

 _'Steve.'_ she berated herself.

He wasn't just Captain America.

People were people, no matter what they could do or had done. That was what she always told herself and had wanted other people to see and understand for years. Distantly, she was disgusted with herself for her moment of awe regarding the man next to her.

He was a _person_.

"I should try to get some sleep," Steve sighed after a while and stood. "That was fun, though," he carefully turned off the tablet.

"Good, I'm glad," Katie grinned.

"Thanks for the mini-lesson," he added.

"Sure, any time," she welcomed and turned back to her tablet.

"Have fun working"

"Eh"

While Steve was occupied she had found Tony's handwriting on some of her notes up here. While it was annoying that Tony read through her things, this _was_ his lab and she didn't leave personal things there for a reason. So she'd been working on deciphering the cramped writing in the margins- like he couldn't grab a fresh post-it for himself.

"Katie?"

She looked up to see that Steve had stopped a few feet from the desk and turned back around. His hands were folded behind his back as he looked back at her expectantly.

"Yeah?"

"It's 5:00am ...are you alright?"

He didn't sound nosey and he certainly was not mocking -he was awake, too, after all. He just sounded concerned and willing, an unspoken offer to help in his tone. Katie couldn't help but allow for a small smile to tilt up her lips.

"I'll be fine," she answered.

"...alright," his head nodded firmly.

"Are you? Okay, I mean," Katie returned softly.

"It's nothing," his impassive face did not break.

"Good," she approved.

Katie thought that even given this polite -if stunted- exchange, they each know they were both lying.

"Good night, then," he bade and turned to go after a last, deeper, nod.

"Night, soldier"

"Ma'am," he responded, throwing a wave over his shoulder on his way to finally take the elevator all the way to his room.


	4. Back-up

Back-up  
 _"Condemn none. If you can stretch out a helping hand, do so. If you cannot, fold your hands, bless your brothers, and let them go on their way.  
_ _-_ ** _Swami Vivekananda_**

Katie hadn't been able to sleep since the turbulence the plane had encountered about halfway through her flight. She had sat about tiredly ever since then.

The flight to D.C out of LaGuardia was not a long one by any stretch of the imagination, but it'd certainly turned out dull this time. It was a little too short to empty out her bag and get anything done but long enough that she'd been a little bored with only her music.

When the plane finally did land, it was smooth and she gathered her things from under the seat in front of her so that she could jump right up as soon as it was her turn. Then, she could stretch her legs and move around without being cramped by the inconsiderate sprawler she'd been stuck next to the window by.

She'd never been to Reagan National Airport, but she had traveled enough to be undaunted. She strolled through the terminal and down the arrival ramp to go figure out where she could go about find her suitcase.

"Kather-Katie ... ...Katie!"

She did not immediately respond to her name being called, but, the second time around, she stopped and twisted. She had to quickly dodge to the side to avoid someone from the crowd who'd all come off the plane together. It was still a few moments before she found the speaker.

He was dressed in khakis and a blue long-sleeve shirt, topped off with a dark hat. She thought that it was the hat that camouflaged him for a second, but it was definitely Captain Steve Rogers.

"Steve," she said in a surprised laugh. "Hi..."

She had to pick her way past others intent on going to claim their luggage, but she made it to him.

"I didn't think my disguise was that good," he jested, meeting her.

"Well, it's quite elaborate," she negated with a joking shrug, "but I didn't know you were picking me up ...assuming this isn't just your favorite afternoon hideout."

"No, I'm here for you," he said and then blinked, a small blush splotching his cheeks at how bold that may have sounded. "Tony asked me to pick you up," he explained more thoroughly. "He didn't tell you?"

...

 _"...so, that's that," Tony had finished after telling her that S.H.I.E.L.D had requested he loan her out to them for a little adjunct work._

 _"And do we trust it?"_

 _Katie had long found S.H.I.E.L.D fascinating. Considering all the "incidents" they had been a part of, it was clear that they had access to outstanding, ground-breaking technology. Not only that, but they had a broad -if not limitless- scope for using their work._

 _However, she also found them suspect._

 _S.H.I.E.L.D knew about remarkable things and beings in this world. They might try not to make public spectacle of everyone and everything they encountered, but they_ ** _did_** _monitor people and try to put restrictions on them. That, in Katie's book, was nearly just as bad._

 _True: some beings S.H.I.E.L.D had met have been maliciously dangerous._

 _Also true: not all extraordinary people could possibly be dangerous ...she refused to accept that S.H.I.E.L.D had the right to dictate what harmless people can or cannot do._ _It was not an open Registration Act, but whatever databases they have were still invasive in her opinion._

 _"I'm bias- I've worked with them"_

 _"And still think they're questionable," Katie pointed out._

 _"True ...though well-intentioned, they can be a little much." he graded and continued to snack away on his bag of Reeses Pieces._

 _"Tony, come on ...how much do they know about me?" Katie asked him sternly._

 _"So we're being serious," he sighed in resignation. "They know you're a boss at programming, hacking, and applied technology."_

 _"That's all?"_

 _"Well, it's all they said," he told her equitably and offered her some candy._

 _Surprised by her hunger, she reached in for a handful._

 _"If they know all about me, I shouldn't go ...right?"_

 _He sighed, leaning on the corner of her desk._

 _"Let's be honest, they probably know about your past ...but they leave that school of yours alone, don't they?" Tony reasoned._

 _"...safety in numbers," she proposed dubiously._

 _"You've still got numbers- hello," he gestured to himself. "Think I'd let them steal you? Nobody touches my stuff -c'mon, get your head out of your ass."_

 _Katie really wanted to make a comment about his male chauvinism that lead him to talk like she was a belonging of his. However, she knew to read it as a sign of his loyalty in this case. He had her back, which she could only ever appreciate._

 _"They sequestered you to your own house once," she reminded him of that story._

 _He waved this away._

 _"You're you and I'm me ...between the two of us, they're not locking you away or blackmailing you into anything you don't want to do," he assured her with the utmost confidence. "Forget everything else ...do you want to check out their facilities and see what they're working with?"_

 _"...kind of."_

 _"Nerd," he accused with a snort. "I'll get my secretary on booking you a flight."_

 _"Really?"_

 _"Sure. It's a work trip- let others pay your way. I'd lend you the jet, but Pepper's got in back in LA," he shrugged carelessly._

 _"Nice ...just give me a day to think on it, okay?"_

 _"Nope," he shook his head. "You want to go, so you're going. I'll have Captain Stars n' Stripes check in on you, huh?"_

 _"You don't need to"_

 _"No, it'll give you peace of mind. If you're nervous you won't do good work, and that reflects poorly on me," he griped._

 _"_ ** _Oh_** _, so you're being altruistic," Katie nodded her understanding then, sarcasm floating throughout her tone._

 _"Obviously"_

 _"...thanks, Tony," she smiled more genuinely._

 _"Uh-huh, whatever," he dismissed, seeming more invested in typing an email to his secretary on his phone._

 _"Tony..."_

 _"Yeah, I heard ... ...Banner is video-ing in up at the lab if you want to come catch that," he changed topics to something less selfless and made for the door. "Twenty minutes."_

 _Katie grinned after him. He really was a good guy ...only he didn't want to discuss it. With this in mind, she finished her handful of candies and started thinking of what she'd need to pack for nearly a week in D.C._

 _It took a few minutes for her to completely register what Tony had said. Dr. Bruce Banner, who Tony said he'd been trying to get to come live at the Tower, was going to video-chat with Tony soon. Of_ ** _course_** _she wanted to have the chance to say hello to him again- he had still been a professor at Culver University when she had been an undergraduate student. Happily, she left her office and scurried to the elevators to get upstairs after Tony._

 _..._

"Well, he said that he was going to let you know I'd be around, not that you'd meet me," she relayed.

"Ah, well ...he asked me to keep an eye on you, so I figured," he shrugged his broad shoulders.

Grinning, Katie thought that maybe he couldn't help but do what he thought to be good manners. That, or he'd been bored lately.

"Well thank you, that's nice. Hope this didn't interrupt anything."

"Nah ... ...baggage claim is this way," he jerked his thumb over his shoulder and proceeded to lead the way.

They stood quietly at the proper carrousel, waiting in semi-awkwardness. Through they knew each other, it wasn't well enough to have a enthusiastic reunion and catch up on good times.

When Katie spotted her red suitcase she darted forward, but as soon as she reached the handle, Steve beat her to it and yanked it off the line. A hand on her back guided her aside so he didn't hit her with the case.

"This it?"

"Uh-huh, thanks ...it rolls, you know," she added when Steve walked away with it in hand.

"It's fine"

He lead her outside to a grey Jeep, which he dropped her suitcase into the back of. He then jogged around the Jeep and beat her to the passenger door so he could pull it open for her.

"Oh! ...thanks," she smiled and climbed up into the jeep as he stood back.

He really couldn't help his old school manners; it was quaint.

"So, have you been to D.C before?" he asked as he was backing out.

"As a school trip when I was in high school," she recalled, "but never on my own."

"Alright ...I wasn't sure if you knew your way around, so I drove around to make sure I knew where you hotel is - Grand Hyatt, right?"

"Wow, thanks ...you didn't have to do that. Doesn't this thing have GPS- it looks new," she observed.

"I think it does, but I don't know how to use it," he muttered his admission.

"I'll show you how," Katie assured.

As promised, after reaching the hotel she fiddled around with his center console screen and walked him through how to program a destination to the GPS. She wasn't positive that the look on his face after her instructional was confidence, precisely, but he seemed to think he could muddle through.

She was about to say goodbye afterwards, but he opened his door at the same time she pushed hers out. He retrieved her case from the back and joined her inside to the lobby so she could check in, standing back patiently as she spoke to the desk clerk.

"I can take it," she reached for her bag once she had her key.

"It's still fine," he simply reassured her.

"Well, thank you," she said yet again and got them to the elevator so they could head up to the 5th floor. "Thanks again," she said for the final time once she opened her room and he stepped in to set her bag down.

"No problem"

"But it's nice," she insisted.

"You're welcome ...nice joint, by the way," he said, looking around to take in the wide room and small but cozy sitting area.

"Right? Stark Industries is paying."

He grinned along with her, understanding that this explained much.

"So, what's the plan?" he returned to business. "You heading in tomorrow or laying low to enjoy the city a while?"

"Yeah, I told them I would be there tomorrow. No reason to wait; I'm curious what they want," she admitted to him.

"Alright," he nodded and started to back out of the room. "What time are you planning? I'll pick you up."

"You don't have-"

"I wouldn't offer if it was an issue," he headed off her well-meaning refusal.

"Okay ...8:00 sound alright?"

"I'll be there," he nodded.

"Great ...I saw a bar downstairs. If you don't have anything to do, wanna grab a bite?" she offered, shedding her sweatshirt.

Her jeans and t-shirt weren't very fancy, but she'd been traveling and it should be nice enough to get a drink and an appetizer.

"Oh, that's alright," he declined, taking a penitent step back. "I'm good ...just, have a nice night."

"If you're sure," Katie shrugged.

"Uh-huh, good night"

"Night"

He stepped back out the door with one last wave and guided himself back to the elevator.

"Steve ..."

He turned and Katie was sticking her head out the door.

"If you want to come a little early tomorrow, we can grab breakfast downstairs," she offered, feeling very much that she needed to repay the kindness he'd already shown in her so-far short time there.

"I'll see," he promised.

She nodded and disappeared again.

Then he was able to actually make it to the elevator.

Steve wasn't sure why, exactly, he declined her first offer. He hadn't had any dinner yet, and he didn't have any particular plans. Maybe the prospect of sitting across a table from a woman was daunting to him. He was fully aware that she had not asked him out to dinner -not _really_. Katie had just wanted dinner and maybe a drink; what was wrong with that?

He glanced at the bar and bistro to the left of the entry as he walked back through. It looked perfectly fine and he did pause ...but then he shook his head and just kept moving.

He was sort of a solo act most days.

* * *

For a few days, Katie was in a heaven for what Logan used to call her _"nerd brain_." She'd gotten a tour of pertinent, but not too hush-hush, areas of the D.C. S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters, the Triskelion. The mini-orientation was not altogether exciting, but it led up to a lot of fun for a techie.

S.H.I.E.L.D was working on super impressive stuff, which she supposed was imperative knowing they were sometimes up against the supernatural.

Stun guns, pulse sticks, enhanced armor ...you name it, S.H.I.E.L.D was at least making an attempt at it.

"So there's a school specifically for science gurus from all over the world?"

Katie was spinning a holographic model of an in-progress weapon while perched on a work table across from her new acquaintance Leonard Fitz - or 'just Fitz,' as he'd requested to be called.

"Pretty much, aye," confirmed the Scottsman. "I was seventeen when I started there."

"That's so cool," Katie smirked her appreciation.

"It was ...I've gone back ta lecture once or twice, but mostly I've been busy," he grinned.

"Progress waits for no one, huh?" she pulled a lopsided grin, studying the diagram before her again.

"Indeed it doesn't ...any experience with this?" he nodded to the plans for a new stun gun he was developing.

"Honestly, not really. Weapons aren't my forte, but I'm willing hear you out and brainstorm," she happily offered, holding the device back out to him.

What followed was an enthusiastic explanation of propulsion mechanisms, balance, and amount of dendrotoxins needed to tranquilize an opponent.

"...it will break up under subcutaneous tissue to disperse quickly enough through the body for nearly instant stopping power."

"And you already have a chemical to do that?"

"In the works. My partner, Agent Simmons, is a bio-chemist ...among other things."

"Good team you've got ...so what's your biggest worry?"

"Propulsion and dispersement ...it needs to be able to travel great distances, but it can't rip through the target."

"Or you might as well use a regular gun," Katie nodded her understanding.

At the school, there had never been a use of guns ...no need, to be honest. Most of the team had other offensive and defensive means via their mutations - guns never had to be part of the picture. Given this, she wouldn't pretend to be a weapons expert, but she did understand the physics behind it, so she could be a sounding board rather than a table decoration.

Fitz bad been the one to show her around a little the previous day and had shown here where she could set up to do her work, but now she wasn't so much _working_ as waiting for the computer to load a program she needed.

Fitz continued prattling about his propulsion mechanisms and the balance of the gun. Katie was able to offer some ideas, but rather thought he needed to talk-out his own thoughts aloud more than he needed outside assistance.

"You know ...you should visit New York and review some of this with Tony Stark," she pointed out as she twisted to drop and sit properly in her borrowed chair because the computer had beeped.

" _That_ would been an opportunity, wouldn't it," Fitz beamed, "but he doesn't work in weaponry anymore."

"He _did_ , though ...plus, he's got non-traditional weaponry in his Iron Man suit," she reminded.

"Yeah ...huh," he mused aloud and trailed off, likely thinking over what he could present the billionare for collaboration. "How'd I go about putting in a request with him? Through S.H.I.E.L.D, I suspect?" he answered himself since Stark was officially an agency consultant.

"Put your number in," Katie paused in typing to toss him her phone, which he nearly dropped. "I'll see if he'd be interested."

"Truly?"

"Sure ...he might be interested in whatever mechanics and chemistry you've got going on in there."

"No?!"

"Dunno. I'll fill him in"

Fitz gleefully entered his contact into her phone. He was so far generally a lab rat, but he'd gladly poke his nose out of D.C to have a go at _Iron Man's suit_. He couldn't wait to tell Simmons...

Katie grinned at him. She couldn't make promises, of course, but didn't see why Tony wouldn't take at least some interest in an effective but non-lethal weapon. Not that she could officially speak for him.

"Hi guys"

Both looked up to see Steve in the doorway.

"Hey," Katie greeted.

Fitz, like yesterday, grew slightly flustered before stamping it down.

"Captain"

"Agent Fitz," Steve nodded in return. "How's it going in here?"

Always so serious.

He was stern around there- all work, no play- but he was also dutiful. Every day he picked her up at her hotel- never a minute later than 8:00am- and dropped her off in that same place each evening. He also stopped-in a couple times every day; sometimes he lingered a while, other times he stayed only long enough to study the room and leave as soon as he surmised all was well. Katie wondered what all Tony had told him to garner this diligence - at any rate, he was comfortably dependent.

Steve had not taken her up on her breakfast offer the first couple days, so she went ahead and stopped bugging him about it. She had no idea how he _did_ spend his time, but he clearly had better things to do.

"Whats up, Steve?" Katie smiled, waving him in so he'd know they weren't busy.

"Just stopping in after a briefing," he explained vaguely and took a few strides in. "Whattcha working on?"

Fitz had sat his projected diagram of his rifle pet-project aside, and Steve bent to examine it curiously.

"Schematics for a prototype," the thin man was comfortable in science-mode even in the face of an American legacy.

He reached his hand over the 3D projection and flexed his fingers to stretch it larger.

"Rather than your standard projectile, this beauty will use dendrotoxins being developed - well, _perfected_ , as we have already run preliminary tests - in the biochemical labs. The dosage has to be small - a _fraction_ of a microlitre- but potent ..."

As Fitz described and thought aloud, Steve shot Katie a look to see if she was following. He had not been under the impression he had asked a scientific question.

Katie caught the blank look.

"Fitz," she laughed.

"Huh?" he pulled up mid-sentence.

"Slow down - he just wants to know what it does," she flashed him a smile.

"I ..." Fitz faltered, sure that's what he'd been doing.

The excitement of his project muted for just a moment.

"Ah," he nodded. "Laymen terms?"

"Please," Steve nodded.

"A knock out gun. Chemically tranquilizes an enemy briefly, instead of using a bullet."

"Oh," Steve nodded readily, then. "How long until it's made?"

"Hard t' say," Fitz admitted. "Still in development, and it's not the first thing on my plate at the moment."

"Fitz is starting training so he'll be qualified for field work," Katie reported.

"Yeah," Fitz nodded a little sheepishly and scratched at his short curls.

But Steve looked upon him kindly, eyes appraising him.

"Good ...skills like yours won't hurt out there," he approved.

"Hopin' so," the younger man shifted.

"I know so- good luck," Steve told him in earnest.

He'd not always been the picture he was now, after all. Smaller than Fitz and sickly to boot, he had been doubted despite his figurative heart. It was no longer so, but he had not forgotten the sting of it. He would not cast the same shame on another willing person- every man had their worth.

"Thanks"

"Course," Steve nodded, "and good luck with this," he waved to the diagram. "See you this evening, ma'am," he bowered out with professional courtesy.

"Rogers," Katie stopped him short. "Are you able to leave earlier than normal today? 3:30ish?"

"Oh. Sure."

"I can grab a cab," she promised.

"No need. I'll meet you at 3:30"

"Okay. I have a dinner, that's all"

"No problem"

With that, he strode out.

"Can't believe Captain Rogers is your chauffeur," Fitz muttered, shaking his head. "And why'd ya tell him I'm doing field training?"

"Because you are?" Katie shrugged.

"Yeah, but he's ... _him_."

"You said you were doing fine," she dismissed his insecurity.

"Yeah, yeah, sure - to my own standards. I can do it, but ...he's, like, the epitome," Fitz grumbled.

"You'll do fine"

Fitz ignored her and returned to work, trying to force down his sudden burst of machismo. _What_ had he let Simmons talk him into...

At 3:30 on the dot, Katie hopped into Steve's Jeep. She thought about Fitz' quip regarding Steve as a chauffeur...

"You really don't have to drive me every day"

"I thought we had this discussion. What's wrong with my driving?" he grinned.

"Nothing, nothing ...I just figure you have other things to do," Katie sighed and stretched out comfortably.

"No feet on the dash," he griped. "Please," he added for good measure.

This reminded Katie suddenly of Cyclops and all the rules he'd always had regarding his cars. For a moment she smiled, then she felt a pang of hurt and lowered her feet with a muttered "sorry."

"I don't mind driving you"

Not for the first time, she wondered what all Tony had said to inspire such diligence in the Captain. For the first time, she asked.

"Not a lot," Steve admitted. "Said you were coming and had some safety concerns. How'd he put it ... _'S.H.I.E.L.D' is shiesty; keep your eyes peeled'_ ," he recounted.

"Sounds right ... ...and you don't argue with his doubts of S.H.I.E.L.D?"

Steve sighed and shifted in his seat, adjusting his hands to hold the top of the steering wheel.

"I could never pretend they don't tell lies ...and they have an agenda," he said diplomatically. "I'm not the conspiracy nut that Tony is, but I've learned to try to be open-minded when it comes to them, I guess."

"Well, you're a good friend to do him a favor," she gestured to herself with a smile.

Steve sent a lopsided grin at her and nodded before looking back to the road.

Tony was a teammate ... ...a friend, yes. Annoying, sure, but all the same. Steve didn't want to call him up everyday, but if he needed a favor he would help. He hadn't even asked a lot of questions, for he accepted that Tony had good reasons for things even if it wasn't always apparent. He trusted that Iron Man would not condescend to scrape for a favor if it wasn't necessary. Plus, the favor involved looking out for Katie, Tony's kind friend, so he wasn't going to refuse.

"So what are your plans tonight?"

"Dinner with a friend ...actually, the mutual friend who recommended me to Stark Industries," she added. "I know him from my last job."

"Oh. That'll be nice."

"Yeah, I hope so. I saw him recently with Tony and Pepper, but it'll be nice to catch up better," she sighed and leaned back.

"Once more with feeling," Steve made fun of her obvious sulking.

"Yeah," she chuckled, caught. "It's just tense sometimes."

"Old flame?" Steve questioned.

Katie giggled.

"Sorry ...I know it's not really my business," he back-tracked hurriedly.

"No, it's just ...no. Hank isn't that. An only teacher ...a mentor, I guess."

"Gottcha"

Katie nodded and worked on feeling better about the coming evening. It wasn't fair to assume it would be a negative experience.

"Well, I hope you do enjoy your dinner," Steve bade her when he pulled up to her hotel like every other evening thus far.

"I'm sure I will. Thanks again for the ride."

"Anytime, ma'am ... ...Katie ," he shook his head at her look. "It just slips out."

"That's alright. You got your own plans tonight?"

"Let's see ...my old card playing buddies are dead, so, no."

He had not meant to sound harsh, but he'd met with Dr. Pullman that morning, which always made him feel _raw_. He was starting to have a hard time understanding how making everything fresh and exposed would help him to put it all away.

"I'm sorry," Katie said softly. "I..."

She wasn't sure what to say to such a woebegone statement. He'd injected it with a note of dry humor, but it still spoke volumes.

"No, I'm sorry," he stopped her. "I've just had a long day -I'm glad we split early."

"Okay ...I'll see you tomorrow then?"

He nodded, so she took her quiet cue to go ahead and get out. Before she even took three steps, she stopped and pivoted around. The door was already locked, so she slapped the window before he could drive away. This pulled his attention from the radio to her.

"Forget something?" he leaned over as the window slid down.

"Not really," Katie leaned into the empty window frame. "Tomorrow's my last morning here."

"I know -flight's at 5:53pm," he verified.

"Yup," she grinned at his recital. "So come have breakfast tomorrow morning, alright? As a thank you," she invited expectantly.

He opened his mouth to protest and faltered; perhaps, she thought, because he had no reason to.

"What'll it hurt?" she egged.

"Okay," he nodded definitively. "It's a date ...oh," he caught himself. "I didn't mean ...I mean-"

"I understand," Katie swallowed a laugh. "It's breakfast."

"Yes," he latched on. "I'll see you then."

"See you then," she waved and finally walked away to get upstairs to her room and pack up.

The next day, Katie sat alone at a small round table in the hotel cafe. Steve had not shown, which struck her as quite odd ...unless he was still uncomfortable about his use of the word "date," which was colloquial enough that she'd hardly even noticed it herself.

So, somewhat grumpily, she ate a quick breakfast on her own. She should have invited Fritz and his girl Simmons - they'd been in school many years and could probably still appreciate a free breakfast when it was offered.

She made a mental note of that for next time.

While trying to decide whether or not she would hold Steve's absence over his head, Katie hurried upstairs to gather her things ... ... ... only Steve never showed to allow her to shove her suitcase in his Jeep and catch a last ride in to work.

So that was how she ended up calling a cab and rolling her red suitcase up and down the S.H.I.E.L.D D.C. headquarters halls. A headquarters where she did not see Steve, which was disconcerting.

When she met with Agent Hill to debrief and discuss the continuation of her work, Katie had been told "not to worry" about Captain Rogers. It was hardly an explanation, really, but she supposed it was relieving to know that his absence was not a surprise or worry to S.H.I.E.L.D.

Still, as she climbed into her taxi for the airport that afternoon, she couldn't help but to think it was a weird end to a surprisingly mellow trip.


End file.
